It’s nearly midnight on the first (ahem…second) day of 2019 and I am eyeing the year with a great deal of trepidation, possibly incredulity, even.
You see, this is the first year in which I have no life-altering plans. No adoptions, no major medical issues (not planned ones, anyway!), no house moves (though I really had hoped we would find a house that suits us better, I think we’ve decided to put that search on hold for now), no further job changes (at least, none planned at this time!).
Even travel thoughts are limited and vague—maybe a (nearby) retreat here or there, hopefully some visits to family. Short trips for concerts or museums. No airplanes, if I can possibly avoid them.
I am also almost finished with my book…well, actually two books. Once I finish the current one, I will just need to do a bit of rewriting and polishing on the next one, and that will be ready, too. I have a Patreon ready to launch. I’m still fiddling with a newsletter, but I don’t think that will take much longer to finish. The biggest challenge right now that I can think of is forcing myself to learn WordPress so I can freshen up this website.
For me, it’s an honestly weird place to be, and I’m not sure what to make of it. Once I finish these two books, I could…write the third book (of which I have only one scene in mind) or more short pieces or work on another book I put down six years ago. Or do something else entirely.
I’m drawn this year by the notion of getting back to some very deep roots: music and martial arts. I’d like to get back to both in a substantive way, for relaxation and better health. And it doesn’t matter if I’m good at either of them, really. I certainly can’t do the things I could as a teen. They’re just things I want to know, languages of the mind and body I miss.
I have many dreams, of course. But I fear to speak them aloud, because I don’t want to jinx them.
Things I’d like to be better at in 2019: being proactive, staying present, and clearing space in my life for new possibilities.
I’ve spent a lot of the last two weeks doing the latter—except for the attic, I’ve gone through everything upstairs and gotten rid of what doesn’t fit, what we don’t need, what the kids don’t play with, etc. My husband has all but finished our kitchen upgrade, and it’s lovely to walk into that room and breathe a sigh of relief rather than grit my teeth in angst. (It was *really* ugly before we gave it a makeover). And for the first time in I don’t know how long, the upstairs is totally clean. I’m beginning to think staycations agree with me.
The next few days I’ll be tackling the biggest challenge—the dreaded basement. I’m looking forward to a much less cluttered life in 2019, that’s certain.
And as for the state of the world, well, I’ve decided to just rest in the knowledge that I’m doing what I can and it’s going to have to be enough. I’ve spent far too much time the last few years feeling terrified, exhausted, and helpless. In the latter half of 2018, I managed to decouple a lot from social media and the horrors of the news and I plan to keep up that trend.
It seems like a good year to get back to basics, and I think the coming Year of the Pig can only help with that.
What are your hopes and plans for 2019?